Cheating spouses. Perhaps there is no
subject more personal, more emotional, more difficult to deal
with than that of a spouse who cheats. First of all, there
is absolutely NO justification for cheating on your spouse.
Point blank. It is a sin in God's eyes. Man has tried in his
own feeble way to categorize sin. Bad sins, and really bad
sins. I have to tell you that my study of the Scriptures absolutely
rejects this concept of categorizing sin. Sin is sin in the
eyes of God no matter what it involves since sin is an act
of rebellion towards God. There is no arguing however, because
of the intimate and sensitive nature of adultery, it is a
highly visible sin because of the raw emotions involved.
First of all, for anyone who has committed adultery,
you need to understand some basic issues. First is that what
you have done is a sin in God's eyes no matter how you may
try to justify or spin it. There is NO circumstance that makes
adultery acceptable. Second, anyone who has been involved
in this type of behavior knows deep down inside the incredible
price you end up paying, for what boils down to a few moments
So what is the answer? Simple. Repent, get right with God,
then begin the long, long process of getting back into a correct
relationship with your spouse. This will take lots of time,
lots of effort. However, God can heal and help you and your
spouse find His peace and love again to live many happy years
together. It is not hopeless. But you have to be willing to
repent, get right with God, and then take the steps necessary
to get right with your spouse. God is able to do all things,
and you will need his help and strength each step of the way,
but He will honor your commitment. Don't give up, that is
what the enemy wants you to do!!!
Second of all, for the spouse that has been cheated on,
it becomes a time for you to find a level of faith and trust
in God you never experienced before. Because of the deep hurt
and wounds, God is your only source of strength during this
time. While the Bible in the New Testament does give a scriptural
"out" in a marriage when adultery is involved, the
reading of the complete Word still proclaims it is God's plan
for one man, one woman, one lifetime. That must be your goal.
You will need to spend much time in prayer for your spouse.
They need your prayers to overcome the wrongs they have done.
You will need to spend much time in prayer with the Lord to
keep in focus that you are loved.
Many spouses who have been cheated on feel that they are
to blame. Listen. You can NOT control the actions of your
spouse. You can NOT be responsible for what they do. Quit
blaming yourself for their actions! Know that in Christ you
are loved and worthy. Lastly, you will need LOTS of prayer
to have a forgiving heart. This, of course, is the most difficult
hurdle to overcome. It is not possible in our strength. Only
God can give you a forgiving heart to go on. Ultimately, the
key will be in your focus on the Lord. Your faith, your trust
in the Lord will be tested and stretched. It is in times like
this when your faith becomes very real.
Fornication. Fornication is and Old Testament word
that means sex outside the bounds of marriage. If you
are having sex and it is with someone other than the person
you are married to, it is fornication. It is clearly defined
as sin in the Bible. Also, Jesus said if you lust in your
heart, you have committed the act of adultery. That may seem
like a very high example to live up to. But that is what God
expects of us. Sin starts in the heart, then moves to the
head, and is ultimately consummated in the act itself. Jesus
was talking about killing sin where it is born, in the heart.
Many ask, "How 'far' can I go with a boyfriend or girlfriend?"
Remember how the Bible says we are to run from temptation.
Listen, if you are trying to find "the line", you
have already crossed it!! You are only playing mind-games
You are in a battle. To win a battle,you must have
a battleplan. Pray, sit down and let God give you a plan you
can faithfully work at each day. Then, you need someone you
can be accountable to on a daily basis. You can't win this
fight alone, you need someone to stand with you, and to hold
you accountable. Lastly, you need the strength you can only
get from God. That comes from your daily relationship through
prayer and the Word, from being in church, from finding ways
to serve the Lord. All of this working
together will help you overcome this battle and see victory.
He is able!!!"
a Prayer Request